My dear great Aunt turns 95 today. Last year she asked for 1 lb weights because she said I inspired her to start lifting. She got them and uses them regularly. I guess I come from a long line of pretty cool women that just don’t know how to stop becoming.
Tonight is her birthday party at my favorite restaurant, one we never go to because it requires I dress up and, well, I don’t dress up anymore. I have 2 pairs of pants for the bill paying job and the rest of my wearable wardrobe is made up of workout clothes.
Last year I lamented to Coach that “I used to rock the sweater dress and now I look disgusting”. Not that I even tried one on last year but I couldn’t look in the mirror without crying. I was too torn between wanting to see every bone and wanting to see my strength. I still am torn but I am further into my journey towards becoming, I am trying harder to see reality. I still avoid mirrors unless my shoulders are prominently on display and when inadvertently I see myself, I no longer cry. I miss being tiny but i love being strong. And my shoulders? I am learning to love one body part at a time. This is a part of my own becoming.
And, yes, Warrior Girl loves herself a sweater dress.
Where is this going, you may be asking? Tonight I have to be presentable. I must follow the dress code, make my dear old great-aunt happy and be a little girly for just a few hours. And if I must do this, I want to do it in the comfort of a sweater dress.
I suck it up and try one on. Holy crap! Another reason to love lifting big weight. This new body that I still can’t think of as mine, the reflection in my mirror…Now this is what rockin’ a sweater dress is supposed to look like!